Ruthless: Ever see women keep their clothes on once porn music is playing? Oh hell no...Larry the plumber stops by for a clogged drain...porn music plays. WHAMMO...clothes gone, and Larry got lucky.
Ruthless: Oh what's that? You are at work...its a long day. Tiffany stops by to give you a quick backrub and in poor dialogue, tells you how you are an asset to her as an employee...BAM. porn music starts, and suddenly..she's nekkid on her desk and you are earning a promotion.
Ruthless: Oh what's that? You are at work...its a long day. Tiffany stops by to give you a quick backrub and in poor dialogue, tells you how you are an asset to her as an employee...BAM. porn music starts, and suddenly..she's nekkid on her desk and you are earning a promotion.
Ruthless: I am telling you. I need to start a band that plays nothing but porn music. We'd be bigger than the Beatles!..
This is an IM convo with my buddy Ruthless. He has a bumper sticker on his car that says, "Porn. It's cheaper than dating." The icing on the cake is he usually is wearing a cap that says, "Porn Star" on the front. I really want to know how men accomplish anything. Clearly, this is an idea to which he has dedicated much gray matter. I am sure I have lost most of the male readers at this point as they are fixated on the Tiffany/backrub/promotion thing. On the positive side, we haven't seen each other in a while and here is his response to my recent picture I sent him;
Ruthless: that's you? holy fuck...you keep getting hotter and hotter and younger and younger looking. i hope the devil got as good a deal; "ok devil, i get..eternal beauty...you get...to see my tits anytime you want!"
Awwww! Couldn't think of a more flattering comment. I love you men. You cannot fake that simplistic honesty. I suppose this is telling of how desperate I am....this was the highlight of my day. Ok Filthy and Gorgeous posse, I am going to struggle to stay awake until my shuttle comes in two hours and fourty minutes. Hopefully I will sleep my way to Chicago. By the way, if anyone hears from Boy Gorgeous please let me know. He is MIA and I am becoming quite worried. Love you, Kat
1 comment:
Mmmmm.... porn. It's lengthened too many bad relationships for me. With enough porn, you can forget you have a girlfriend, current girlfriend included. With the amount of energy and cash men devote to porn you would think it would be a bigger fixture in the world instead of existing on the fringes of American society. Of course that's only in the US; in Japan, men read porn openly on the subway and you can buy it from vending machines.
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